HAIRSTYLE

 

It's about losing hair

how it just isn't fair

the guys lose theirs first,

some in their twenties

by thirty it's thin

but thank god bald is in

 

I hear your complaint

and I sympathize, I do

but you must realize

that I lose my hair too

 

and if you're a guy

you've got options, you see

there's that Hair Club for Men

(but no Hair Club for me...)

 

or a guy can buy paint

with a halo to wear

you cover the bald spot

and comb what's left over there

 

of course if you insist

on the combover

you'll get the onceover

then we laugh -- we can't resist...

 

or the guy can get weaves

or transplant hair plugs

or if that doesn't work

there are guys who wear rugs

 

but back to the women:

we lose our hair too

and do we get sympathy? No.

we just get the blues.

 

A guy going bald

can just shave his head

if he does, well, he's stylin'

"Looks good, man!" is said

 

But a bald woman now

that's a way different thing

either chemo for cancer

(Gee how sad! someone'll sing)

 

Or worse if she shaves

it's gonna make waves

she must be a feminazi bitch

(this last is said smiling, with nostrils that twitch)

 

So here we are friend: I'm losing my hair

my options are limited

does anybody care?

or hey... do I dare

to be different?

 

I've decided from now on I'll no longer sweep

my lost hair from the bathroom floor

I'll just leave it there

and I'll comb it with care

and at least I'll have a hairstyle

...somewhere.